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Volume X, Issue No. 8
September, 2004
HIV/AIDS Volunteer Enrichment Network
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Volume X, Issue No. 8
September, 2004
HIV/AIDS Volunteer Enrichment Network
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By Tony Teano
Hosted by Diane Goforth and Pete Peterson at their home on Sullivan Cove at 301 Park Drive in Severna Park, the annual Crab Feast is a crowd-pleaser. This year, Pete brings us “Hillbilly Golf!” If that isn’t your gig, go tidal swimming in Sullivan’s Cove off of the Severn River (if the jellyfish haven’t arrived)—just bring a change of clothes and your own towel. Or, ask Diane to take you out sailing on a sunfish! The party starts at noon on Saturday, September 18th, and lasts until 5 o’clock PM. Bushels of crabs will be there, of course! Hotdogs and hamburgers and sodas round out the menu. Feel free to bring a side-dish, but it isn’t required to attend. All HAVEN client-events are non-alcoholic. See the enclosed flyer for more details. Remember, some folks may bring guests who don’t know about their HIV status—it could just be a day out at a picnic for them. So use your best judgment in talking about HIV/AIDS and HAVEN-related or any confidential matters. If you can help cook, transport folks, setup or cleanup, please give Tony a call to let him know. WE ARE IN NEED OF VOLUNTEERS TO HELP WITH THIS EVENT ! (Set up, cooking, clean up, drive, etc.)
By Rhonda Vous
By Tony Teano
So. You’re gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgendered or “gay friendly.”
You live around the Bay Region. And you
don’t know what to do the weekend you get this newsletter (8/21). Why not mosey on over to Quiet Waters Park’s
Sycamore Pavilion from 1 PM to dusk for the Chesapeake Pride Picnic? This year they are having a fabulous Hawaiian Luau theme. There will even be a prize for best
costume! Say “Aloha” to Tony (or the
Amazingly Fierce Miss Rhonda Vous) at the HAVEN table. Experience the Island “Ohana.” Food &
soft drinks will be provided. The cost
is $10 for adults, $3 for children, and kids under 5 are free. (When you arrive at the park, tell the
guard you are with the picnic; the picnic fee includes park admission!) More info?
Call Frank or Ray from Annapolis Gay Men at 410-263-7128. “Mahalo!” 
August 26
Luncheon prepares for DECEMBER 1 Event
By Tony Teano
The Anne Arundel County World AIDS Day Committee are
offering a luncheon on August 26 to promote awareness of HIV/AIDS issues in the
county and to call for a faith-based response to the pandemic on World AIDS Day
on December 1. The luncheon will be
from noon until 2 PM at the Broadneck Baptist Church. For more information, or to reserve your spot at this event, call
Rev. Melanie Vaughn-West at 410-571-9849.
The 2004 international theme is “Women and AIDS.”
By Tony Teano
Melaine Lee from the North Arundel Alumnae Chapter of Delta Sigma Theta Sorority contacted me to let me know of some great news. The Carnivale co-produced by her chapter and the Annapolis Alumnae chapter in March for HAVEN by her chapter received an award at their National Conference in Las Vegas with over 12,000 women in attendance. Melaine said, “It was quite exciting. But now we have to move forward with the next Carnivale. We need to find a larger site.” It sounds like they have bigger and better things in store for us! Congratulations, ladies, on the award, and thanks again for all your hard work and dedication to the issue of HIV/AIDS.
QUALITY
OF
LIFE
RETREATS
By
Tony Teano
The Baltimore-Washington Conference of the United Methodist Church sponsors spiritual “Quality of Life Retreats.” Raymond Shattuck is available to answer questions about the retreats (410-626-2834). NOTE: If you register for a retreat and something comes up preventing you from attending, give the retreat coordinator the courtesy of a call saying you will not be able to attend so that he may offer the spot to someone on the waitlist; otherwise, if you are a “no show,” you run the risk of being ineligible for a retreat for an entire year!
By Diane Goforth
HAVEN is looking for a person or two with marketing skills who would volunteer to help us develop an outreach plan. We already have staff and volunteers doing much of the work, but we need someone to organize us. Our goals are (1) to make clients aware of our program; and (2) to develop volunteer resources. Elements of the plan might include items such as our web site, marketing documents (brochures, an annual report, etc.), direct mailing lists (including email), and public service announcements. Please contact me so we can discuss your involvement. Diane Goforth, Executive Director. 410-544-2244 or email DSGoforth@aol.com.
Reminder: RYT
Bernadette Zorio offers yoga!
By
Tony Teano
Thanks again, Bernadette, for offering yoga to the HAVEN community and for choosing to do your certification internship with us. For those who missed that chance with us, or for those who wish to continue doing Yoga with Bernadette, you may be interested to know that she will teach at the Annapolis Recreation Center starting Monday, September 20 at 12 noon. The class will run for 8 weeks. There is a nominal fee; however, limited scholarships are available if needed. Please contact Bernadette (410-956-5969), or Sherry Whiteford at the recreation center (410-263-7958).
By Kim Watson
Thank you, Kim, for
taking the time to compose newsletter articles based on Don Miguel Ruiz’s book,
The Four Agreements. Those who
have been following this series may recall the first two agreements: (1) Be
Impeccable With Your Word; and (2) Don’t Take Anything Personally. Now, with the final two agreements at hand,
lets try on this ancient Mayan/Toltec wisdom system!
Don’t make assumptions. That is the third step to living a more peaceful happy life according to Don Miguel Ruiz in his book The Four Agreements. Have the courage to ask questions and discern the truth in every situation. Everybody judges the world based on their own perceptions, history, and beliefs. We make assumptions about what someone meant instead of hearing what they actually said. Once we make an assumption, (consciously or unconsciously) we believe it to be the truth, and we react based on these false truths. Next time you notice yourself getting upset because of something someone else said or did – stop thinking about the situation and ask them what they meant by their actions and/or words. You might be very surprised to find out that the problem was all in you head, based on false assumptions that you created. It is also important not to make assumptions about what other people know. In any kind of relationship, we can make the assumption that others know what we think and want, and that we do not have to ask for anything. We assume that they are going to do what we want because they know us so well. If they do not do what we want, we feel hurt and think “How could you do that? You should know better.” Developing the courage to ask questions until you understand the truth in a situation will help eliminate drama and unnecessary negative emotions from your life. So will letting people know what you want and need, instead of assuming that they already know. Gaining clarity in all situations is the power of the third agreement.
According to Don Miguel Ruiz, one of the simplest steps to living a happier life is to always do your best. This is the fourth agreement. All we ever expect of anyone else is that they do their best – yet somehow we never believe that our best is good enough. We spend our lives believing every negative thing that anyone says about us. We learn to judge ourselves, and become our own worst critics. We feel that we do not deserve any recognition just by being and doing our best. To start breaking these patterns, we need to remember a few simple (but hard to live by) rules:
The truth is very simple: You do not need the acceptance of others. You have the right to be you. Therefore, learn to be happy with yourself and your talents. If you always do your best, then you can avoid self judgment, self abuse, and regret. Oriah Mountain Dreamer said it best when she said that the real question is not “Why am I so infrequently the person that I want to be?” The real question is “Why do I so infrequently want to be the person I really am?” The book The Four Agreements defines a way to live in today’s hectic, harsh, and sometimes unkind world without letting it destroy your life, happiness, and health. No matter what happens, only you have to power to make yourself unhappy. That means that you also have the power to make your life peaceful, joyous, and whole. If you want to start changing your life: be impeccable with your word, don’t take anything personally, don’t make assumptions, and always do your best.
By Diane Goforth
HAVEN is in need of adults with a car to work over the weekend at Our House, a transitional housing program for people living with HIV. Tasks include providing companionship, transportation and seeing that household chores are attended to. Pay is around $200 for the weekend, meals included. Please call Diane Goforth at 410-544-2244 to apply.
h.A.v.e.n.
Telephone Numbers
Bob Davis,
President
703-841-4460
email: bdavis@caci.com
or: write to
P.O. Box 514, Arnold, MD 21012
or: Diane or
Tony can have him call you
Executive Director
Diane Goforth
(410) 544-2244
Director of Volunteers & Client Services
Tony Teano
(410) 224-2437
Housing Director & Buddy Services
Coordinator
Vance Larson
(410) 672-7571
Our House Resident Manager
Sharon Dawson
(Reach through Vance or Diane)
HAVE A SAFE AND HAPPY
LABOR DAY WEEKEND!
